Hey parents!
I just want to know, how do you deal with all the ISH children do?
Sincerely, Lindsay
I have been a governess now for a couple weeks, and everyday I think daaaaaaaang, children can do some reDIKULOUS things. I have now extensively worked with children, and I always think they are hilarious. But I am always just a teacher or a counselor, and never really there 24/7. So this governess job has been enlightening. A few things I have learned about myself: 1) Children know immediately by my friendly American face that I am not very strict or scary or intimidating. 2) It fills me with rage when someone rolls their eyes at me. YOUR EYES WILL GET STUCK LIKE THAT FOREVER. 3) Jumping on the trampoline is always a good time, no matter how old you are. Everyone needs one! Even a small one would be awesome.
To expand on number one. Amina and I were playing “chase” around the house which consisted of me hiding behind things and scaring her periodically. Why there were scissors suddenly involved in this equation, I am not so sure. Amina suddenly held the scissors and said, “look!” making a cutting action and getting a little too close to me. I had said that it was not particularly necessary for her to display cutting since I already knew the purpose of scissors. Then she came up to me and cut a straight up hole right in the middle of my t-shirt. The point is, I don’t really mind that I have a hole in my shirt. Whaterrrr it’s just a shirt. But, she knows that she can get away with it! She knows that she will go unpunished by me because I am not her mom, or of any blood relation to her. Whenever Amina’s mom sees her hit me or slap my arm, she asks what do you think you’re doing??!! And Amina responds by saying “that’s how we play.” NO, THAT’S HOW YOU PLAY! Do you see me cutting holes in your clothes or punching you in the face?! Yeah, I DON’T THINK SO BECAUSE THAT’S ABUSE. Children just freaking know I am a friendly teddy bear. I just think Amina you are so cute and fun! Then there goes a hole in my shirt, next step, my hair, then following my hair, my debit card! YOU JUST NEVER KNOW.
As for point number two, I just haaaate it when kids roll their eyes at me. Whenever I see it I know they’re thinking that this person could not be more annoying to me than anyone else in the entire universe right now. When kids roll their eyes, they are annoyed, disgusted, and positively revolted by your presence. They say ugh, PLEASE stop speaking. I always say DON’T ROLL YOUR EYES AND LOOK AT ME! They are going to get stuck like that, and everyone who sees you will think you’re annoyed with them, and then you’ll have no friends. So think about that next time you want to roll your eyes!
And finally, point number three. TRAMPOLINES ARE THE BEST! I remember having one as a kid, and our neighbors had one as well. They are awesome, obviously, because you can jump for hours then sleep forever because you are surprisingly worn out. Kind of like swimming. When you’re a kid you could swim forever, and then you would want to go to CiCi’s pizza and eat for 14 people. I remember my sister jumped with her leg cast on and she accidentally flipped over twice because of the extra weight from her leg. SO HILARIOUS AND SCARY.
But parents, really, how do you do it? Don’t you think hey when I say no, it actually means NO? It’s not opposite day, it’s not another language I am speaking, I am not simply joking to prolong your insolent behavior, so NO you cannot have a fourth bowl of ice cream. SHEESH! Or when kids ask hey mom and dad, let’s listen to this kidz bop version of Creed again and you want to say please please pleaaaase don’t develop bad music taste! That shiz is the WORST! But you want them to be independent. It’s difficult for me to understand, because I don’t remember having lots of set rules. I am pretty sure I knew the line, and I don’t think I ever really pushed it. I just abide by the rules by nature. I know I did annoying crap when I was a child (taste of my own medicine now, I guess!), as in I was stubborn and could get things into my head very easily. I am still a bit like that now. But yeah, I could mention that I wanted holographic flower platforms about 2946238750 different ways until my parents relented. Oh and those holographic flower platforms, YEAH THOSE WERE REAL.
But really, I love my job. Kids are hilarious and teach you a lot of patience, and to realize that alone time is a very, very precious thing. VALUE IT!
Also, I wanted to have a little entry about my new obsessions. To the tune of “Confessions” by Usher, These are my obsessions…
1) SHOGUN. This is a book my dad has mentioned for years, and like his love for the band Swing Out Sister, I’ve avoided it. But now we have the Berg Book Club, and this is our first pick. It’s baller! And over 1,000 pages. Don’t worry, it’s not like Infinite Jest or anything.
2) Dry shampoo. I am a believer!
3) Frank Ocean’s new album Channel Orange. He is an excellent singer, and I have always been a sucker for R&B (Boyz II Men, bless you soulful men!), so this album is off the chaaaaaain. Especially the song Thinkin’ Bout You.
4) Instant coffee….SIKE.
5) Bossypants, by Tina Fey. She is my idol, my favorite comedienne, my hero, my inspiration, and she also makes my wee myself. READ THIS BOOK. I have already read it twice, and it’s always funny.
6) This American Life, a radio show and podcast about different themes each week. Ira Glass man, you da JAM!
7) The Wire. I know this show has been highly acclaimed and forever loved my a kajillion people, but I just love it. I have always been interested in crime, gangs, and drugs, so basically this is my favorite show besides The OC. I know they vary widely from one another, but whatev. Why am I interested in the world of drug lords and meth, you ask? I don’t know, maybe because an intense game of monopoly is too much conflict for me, so I can only read about conflict and not have it in real life.
Keep it real!
lindsayinrussiaround2 
um why was I not invited to the Berg Book Club? or is that not a real thing… because if it’s not it should be.
I’m so with you, Lindsay! Kids are pyscho and so annoying sometimes although I realize the cuteness factor of some make you forget it. I really don’t know how parents do it all the time. Perhaps they handle it because they are often the only pepole who can control their little ones.
Fab blog post!
Keep it real, lady!
As a parent (and teacher) of this world, here are some lessons that have worked for me:
1) God made kids cute for a reason…protection.
2) Learn to say “No” (in many different ways and actions). You will thank yourself later and so will the kids you care for. Kids don’t always know when to stop; they have to be taught. Sometimes they DO know limits and just want to test to see how far they can go. Over time, loose boundaries create unhappy caregivers and the kinds of kids others prefer to avoid. Kids can WEAR YOU OUT and wear out their welcome without boundaries.
3) As a caregiver, it’s so important to take care of yourself in body and mind in order to stay in charge. It’s like when you’re on a plane…you give yourself the oxygen first, and then you can help the child next to you. Charles Stanley said this: Remember HALT – Don’t let yourself get too hungry, too angry, too lonely, or too tired.
4) Disciplining a child IS hard because most people don’t like to make kids cry or temporally hurt their feelings. It’s hard to deny kids’ wishes. There are worse things, though, than unhappy kids. Spoiled kids, disrespectful kids, destructive kids, insensitive kids, lawless kids, etc. When discipline seems difficult, I often ask myself, “If I let this behavior go, will I be helping or hurting this child on his/her path to success?” Most of the time, my answer is “hurting.” That answer has given me the strength to discipline many times.
5) Discipline is guidance, not punishment. It’s done in love, not anger.
6) A disciplined child is much more pleasant to be around. As parents and caregivers, we want others to enjoy their company. A disciplined child is teachable and learns more. Discipline opens the doors of opportunity.
7) Disciplined kids are still fun…even more so.
8) Practice your “teacher face” in the mirror.
Hope this helps… and shout “GO-O D(for discipline)! “ to yourself when you need to! (Actually God helps a lot, too, especially when praying for patience!)
It sounds like you’re doing a great job and I can just see you smiling and enjoying yourself!
Take care! =)
Thank you so much for the wise advice! I really appreciate it, especially questioning myself if I am enabling and ultimately hurting a child by not saying NO when I need to. You’re the best!
You’re welcome! I forgot to add that what works for one kid might not work for another, and what works one time might not work the next. Creativity, which you have lots of, is totally necessary! I guess be creatively consistent????
Good luck! I just love reading about your adventures!